Yeah. I pretty much need this list this week. Hope you can find a laugh or two and a reminder that, you know what? It's perfectly okay not to be knocked up... you know, for now.
1. Date night can be any night of the week. Monday night dinner and a movie? Why, of course. Tuesday night sushi and bowling? You betcha! No babysitters, no hassle, no "Ohhhh my gosh I'm so sickkkk and so tired I just wanna go to bed nowwwwwwww" sentiment; just you, your handsome beau, and a whole lot of L-O-V-E. *wink, wink*
2. Hello, forbidden foods. Got a hankering for a glass of wine, a spicy tuna handroll, or some decadent soft cheeses? Eat up, girlfriend. Unless, of course, you're allergic to seafood. Or you're an alcoholic.
3. Rolling in the Benjamins. It's easier to justify a wardrobe splurge (Anthropologie, I love you) when you're not spending every last dime on booties, onesies, and doctor's appointments. Get your hair done. Get your nails done. Go have a spa day. Treat yourself to something fabulous that reminds you just how fabulous you are.
4. The numbers on the scale don't have to go up. They can go down. Or stay the same. And you don't have to worry about looking like you're smuggling a watermelon under your sweater in a matter of months (unless, of course, you go overboard with the soft cheeses).
5. There's no chance of terms like "mucus plug" or "birthing ball" entering your conversations. Frankly, your friends will just like you better because of this.
6. Strangers won't have compulsive urges to rub your belly. At least, I hope not.
7. "I'm going to DisneyWorld!" Live it up at a theme park, waterpark, or some other physically adventurous activity. You won't have to worry about harming an unborn baby. Or you know, exploding an inner tube on the Lazy River.
8. No worry of involuntary flatulence. A girl told me that she could literally propel herself across the room when she was pregnant. Hmmm. Okay. Yeah. I...I don't really know what to say to that.
9. People won't avoid you on account of your, ahem, "hormonal rages." No walking on eggshells around you, missy. You're free to be the life of the party without fear that you'll burst into tears over your swollen ankles or mismatched socks. And, you know, your husband won't be scared of you.
10. You can still see your feet. Yeah. 'Nuff said.
Got a good reason it's okay not to be knocked up? I'd love to hear it!
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